Sometimes when I'm feeling caged in and spunky, I like to screw with my hair in the mirror and create different characters. I mean, we've all done that, right guys? Guys? Anyway, I thought I'd take you along for the ride.
"The Ryu Hayabusa" or "The Gay Rapist"
"Disaster" or "3 1/2 Minutes with the Gay Rapist"
"The Gentleman Caller" or "Kissable, Aren't I?"
"Angry Euro Star" or "Michigan Gas Station Attendant"
It is now clear who the "office card" is at the copy place. It is the younger sister, a girl called Amanda, of one of the scanners. She actually isn't all that unfunny. An exchange I witnessed:
AMANDA: I don't know what kind of drugs she be doin', but she was foamin' out da mouth.
AMANDA: (with studied timing) FOAMIN'....OUT...DA...MOUTH.
(HOWLS OF LAUGHTER)
AMANDA: And don't you take any more of my candies. Because I WILL sue you.
SISTER: Shut up.
AMANDA: I will. I sue you for stress in the workplace.
I think I'll miss these people.