One thing is certain: this assignment in Michigan is as slow as Star Jones' metabolism. However, it DOES make one hunger for reading material, if not a hunting knife to fillet the next person who has even a vague midwestern accent. In the past two weeks, I've averaged four to five crosswords a day, attempting to consume the news in their respective papers as well (yes, I eat the news...wiseass). Now, two of you (Jordan and Solomon), know about my favorite headline of last week (as reported by USA Today, of all periodicals):
"Free Comic Book Day is Graphic, Novel"
It gave me a chuckle. So, I've been keeping an eye out for headlines or stories that raise a wry smile. They don't have to be clever. They can be also be worded in an unfortunate manner. Here are today's:
NEW YORK TIMES -
"Iraq Set to Unify Security Forces to Battle Chaos" (reportedly, the Greek "Founder of all things" could not be reached for comment)
"An Agency's Worst Nightmare: Ads Created by Users" (the heroin spots for Nike are particularly fucked up)
"Judge in Enron Case Delivers a Serious Blow to the 2 Defendants" (tee hee)
THE DETROIT TIMES -
"Babies Get Their Own TV Channel"
"Are We loving Orcas to Death?"
"'Poseidon': What a Sinker!"
"Police: Boyfriend Apologized in Murder"
DETROIT FREE PRESS -
"Squid Saves Drifters"