Friday, January 16, 2009

Forgive me for curbing my enthusiasm

I understand that economy stinks on ice right now, but do employers really have to take THAT big an advantage of it? Every job posting is like:

Looking for hard-working, dedicated individuals who are detail-oriented, friendly, self-starters, and can think on their feet. This position may include heavy lifting and other rigorous manual labor, so all interested applicants should be willing to dead-lift 250 lbs of hot steel every ten minutes. Also, this is a professional environment, so it is preferred that all applicants, both male and female, dress in a full tuxedo replete with top hat and monocle. This position answers to the President, Vice President, Assistant Vice President, Assistant to the Deputy, the Deputy to the Bursar, John J. Google, Cap'n Crunch, Mayor McCheese, Doctor Strange, Vlad the Impaler, and L'il Timmy. Compensation: $10 an hour

5 comments:

mugwatch said...

I hear Mayor McCheese has an attitude problem, too.

Anonymous said...

This is capitalism in action; everyone benefits! You'll be so strong after lifting you could run for governor of California and win! Just change your accent.

Anonymous said...

I hear Doctor Strange's meetings always run long. And the Cap'n is never happy about it. But hey that's why they pay the big bucks to be a part of those meetings.

Ira Lopez said...

You're just jealous of Lil Timmy cause he's willing to work harder.

Daniel said...

You forgot "Must have 5+ years experience and a masters degree". All for the low pay of $10 an hour.