Wednesday, July 05, 2006

How fortunate...

Because Verizon is a giant, automatous whore, I needed to deliver my Motorola RAZR (I like to pronounce it "Rah-zir") to my nearest Verizon Wireless store in order to update my firmware (ooh!) and re-enable my phone to transfer files between the handset and my computer (Verizon conveniently "turned this function off" in the factory installed software when I originally got the phone. After irate customers threatened to, I dunno, get, uh, good and angry I guess(?), Verizon decided not to crush its patrons with a single, networky blow and allow them to have their petty file transferring, flabbergasted that not everyone was killing themselves to sign up for VCAST).

And so, I had to give up my lil' guy to get serviced (also, my phone too...ho ho!). Now, as soon as I got my RAHZIR, I customized it right away by adorning it with a banner which reads: "YOUR FORTUNE: YOU WILL DIE OF AIDS" You know, so anyone who opened my phone could have a nice, good-natured chuckle. As silly as I am and can be, I plum forgot to take this banner down before servicing my device, and the Verizon Tech Support man was not pleased:

HIM: That's not a very nice fortune.

ME: (frustrated and annoyed) What?

HIM: (genuinely hurt) I said, that's not a very nice fortune.

ME: (realizing what he was talking about) Oh! Oh...I'm...I'm sorry. I should've taken that...I should be careful who I show that to.

And silence for the rest of my visit. Nice and awkward, the way God intended.

5 comments:

Amanda said...

In the years since I joined the cellular revolution, my banner message has not changed: it still reads "Eat A Dick." I am perpetually afraid the phone will fall into the wrong hands (say, those of my boss) and I'll have a lot of 'splainin' to do. Thanks for the cautionary tale.

Amanda said...

In the years since I joined the cellular revolution, my banner message has not changed: it still reads "Eat A Dick." I am perpetually afraid the phone will fall into the wrong hands (say, those of my boss) and I'll have a lot of 'splainin' to do. Thanks for the cautionary tale.

Amanda said...

In the six years since I joined the cellular revolution, my banner message has not changed: it still reads "Eat A Dick." I am perpetually afraid the phone will fall into the wrong hands (say, those of my boss) and I'll have a lot of 'splainin' to do. Thanks for the cautionary tale.

Amanda said...

Goddammit!!!!

Brenda said...

I never liked that banner anyway. Go figure.