It's easy to dismiss my recent arousal to action. I've cried wolf too many times, I suspect. Of course, those countless iterations of "I'm a changed man" were half-assed at best, meaningless, weak self-assertions that, ultimately, fell prey to the larger problem. It's all fine and good to say it's different this time, but it goes without saying that it's difficult to convince people of something that they openly wanted for me but I always rejected: an acceptance of my full potential. In a book I'm currently reading entitled Quantum Reality, its author summarizes Heisenberg's interpretation of the Copenhagen School of quantum theory as an observer-created reality that is founded on mere possibilities, potentials, and, most poignantly I feel, promises. Despite Heisenberg's assertion that there doesn't exist a "deep reality" behind what we see, I happen to identify with this idea of reality as an ever-evolving promise. The future, in effect, is promising. Whether or not that's good or bad is up to you.
And I know what you're all thinking (Jordan). My promise isn't aimed specifically at Brenda. We all go through intense desires to win back our loves with grand, sweeping gestures of change and self-enlightenment. Rather, this is aimed at all of my friends and family and, most importantly, myself. This isn't some self-delusional, granola-crunching, hippie moment of revelation. This is simply acknowledging what's been true all along. I will rock you, pure and simple. And all my imaginary "competition," in love, in life, in career, can, quite frankly, kiss my ass. There are countless carbon copies of "men" out there and I am happy to say that I am not only outside their league, but above it. And, despite my lofty yet achievable goal of becoming a working actor, I understand quantum theory, my niggas, and I guarantee that the other halfwits at Beth Melski casting aren't mulling over the Uncertainty Principle. Most likely, they're considering the Uncertainty Principal, a high-level educator at their hometown school about whom the students were never quite able to obtain both his location and velocity. Quantum physics jokes? Come on those KILL in Copenhagen!
Oooh, that reminds me, I'd like to construct a stand-up routine completely out of high-brow intellectual jibberjabber. Yeah, I'd get booed off the stage, but my friends would laugh.
"And says to him, I says, 'know it? I developed the mathematical principals SURROUNDING it!'"
"Get off the stage, you fruit!"
5 comments:
Dennis Miller seems (seemed?) to pull off the high-brow humor rather well.
I've had many a false start at self-actualization. You know, promised I'd changed, sputtered around claiming to change only to fall into old habits in a couple weeks.
Personally, I'm glad you've woken up. Sorry to have missed a couple other false starts in the last decade, but at least I'll see the real one.
Or will I? Heisenberg and all, if I observe am I stopping the actualization from happening? Or was my absence as observer keeping you from success in the past?
Quantum physics jokes? No, my friend. Quantum physics is the joke. Spooky particles that blink in and out of existence, events that vary based on if you're watching, it's all proof that the universe really is out to make us nuts.
So there's this cat. In a box. And guess what? I killed it.
i was wondering when the boxmen would strike.
Whatever it took for you to do what we've all wanted you to do for at least the six years I've known you . . . thank effin Christ.
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